Being a parent I always love to pick up books that poke fun at the highs and lows that are part and parcel of the ‘job’, and Gill Sims’ books have certainly provided me with a copious amount of hilarity to date. Having already discovered Why Mummy Drinks and Swears I’ve been eagerly anticipating the next instalment in the series to find out Why Mummy Doesn’t Give A ****! I was extremely lucky to receive a copy of this forthcoming book ahead of it’s publication later this month and I’m sharing my thoughts in today’s post. Thanks to Harper Collins and Lucy Brown for sending me the book.
Family begins with a capital eff.
I’m wondering how many more f*cking ‘phases’ I have to endure before my children become civilised and functioning members of society? It seems like people have been telling me ‘it’s just a phase!’ for the last fifteen bloody years. Not sleeping through the night is ‘just a phase.’ Potty training and the associated accidents ‘is just a phase’. The tantrums of the terrible twos are ‘just a phase’. The picky eating, the back chat, the obsessions. The toddler refusals to nap, the teenage inability to leave their beds before 1pm without a rocket being put up their arse. The endless singing of Frozen songs, the dabbing, the weeks where apparently making them wear pants was akin to child torture. All ‘just phases!’ When do the ‘phases’ end though? WHEN?
Mummy dreams of a quirky rural cottage with roses around the door and chatty chickens in the garden. Life, as ever, is not going quite as she planned. Paxo, Oxo and Bisto turn out to be highly rambunctious, rather than merely chatty, and the roses have jaggy thorns. Her precious moppets are now giant teenagers, and instead of wittering at her about who would win in a fight – a dragon badger or a ninja horse – they are Snapchatting the night away, stropping around the tiny cottage and communicating mainly in grunts – except when they are demanding Ellen provides taxi services in the small hours. And there is never, but never, any milk in the house. At least the one thing they can all agree on is that rescued Barry the Wolfdog may indeed be The Ugliest Dog in the World, but he is also the loveliest.
Ellen is back with another year of diary entries and this time she is doing it alone! After kicking cheating husband Simon to the kerb she is moving on with her life in her ‘perfect’ rural cottage with her two angelic moppets – well maybe not! Peter and Jane have transformed into teenagers since we last saw them which presents yet another set of challenges for Super Mum Ellen to conquer, like how will she ever manage to keep Peter away from the fridge? But, fear not a glass of wine is never too far away to help her ease her way through!
Juggling a full-time job, the kids, co-parenting and her growing number of pets might seem enough for most, but Ellen finds herself thrown into the world of online dating after much persuasion from her friends. Floundering in an unfamiliar alien world, unsure of the modern-day dating etiquette she is certain she’s destined to spend her twilight years alone and sexless with only the company of ever faithful Judgy the dog and new canine addition ‘horse-dog’ otherwise known as Barry. With so much on her plate is it any wonder she seeks a life where no ****s are given?
As with all of my favourite reads, I found writing this review so difficult trying to find the right words to sum up my feelings without giving any spoilers! From the start of this series I have adored each and every page of Gill’s easy writing style as well as her cast of colourful, yet relatable characters. As a Mum of two teens myself this book is so pertinent to my situation and meant I could completely emphasise with Ellen on every step of her parenting journey, especially being deemed an embarrassment by your own daughter, it’s my speciality! Having said that I challenge anyone with or without children not to laugh out loud whilst reading this book, it’s definitely not just for parents.
Like previous books in the series this story includes the perfect mix of humorous and poignant moments taking your emotions along for a real roller coaster of a ride. Gill’s honestly written, witty humour is parenting humour gold and left me honking with laughter more times than I can count – I’ll never be able to look at a Swiss Army Knife in the same way!
This is one of my top reads of the year to date and I think my favourite (by the smallest margin ever) book of the series. If you are looking for something to keep you engaged, entertained and most importantly laughing this Summer then I’d highly recommend you grab yourself a copy immediately, but be aware it’s a highly addictive read so be sure to clear your diary and devour as quickly as you can!
About The Author
Gill Sims is the author of the hugely successful parenting blog and Facebook site ‘Peter and Jane’, which now has a staggering 400+ followers. Her first book Why Mummy Drinks* was the bestselling hardback fiction debut of 2017, and spent over six months in the Top Ten of the Sunday Times Bestseller Charts. Her second book Why Mummy Swears* spent seven weeks at Number One in the Sunday Times Bestseller Charts and over 20 weeks in the Top Ten.
She lives in Scotland with her husband, two children and two Border Terriers, because apparently one terrier didn’t cause enough trouble. Gill’s interests include drinking wine, wasting time on social media, trying and failing to recapture her lost youth, and looking for one of the dogs when he decides to go on one of his regular jaunts, while trying to stop the other one eating unspeakable things.
Why Mummy Doesn’t Give A ****! is available to order now from Amazon*